Hey, it’s Zita here. Thanks for being here.
I was thinking… I'm not sure about you, but I know that I can be my own biggest enemy. I am an expert at discouraging myself, at holding myself back, at telling myself how I am not capable of the thing I am supposed to do.
Let's just take this newsletter thing as an example. I know I should have started it ages ago. But I was postponing it, convincing myself that it's not yet the right time, I can do it later, I will do it later. Truth is, I was putting it off because I thought no one would subscribe, no one would ever be interested. Oh, not true, I knew my mum would be reading this too, to support me (hi, mum!), but does that really count - on a professional level? Nah, it doesn't.
And yet, here we are - you are here (thank you!) and I am here too. Overcoming my fear, convincing myself that I have things to say and there will be someone who listens.
I need to stop holding myself back, I need to get out of my own way. I need to stop sabotaging my own success out of sheer fear and useless frustration…
Life is full of ups and downs, full of obstacles, full of new mountains to climb. And as if all the external difficulties that can set us back weren't enough, often our greatest obstacle is ourselves.
It's unnoticeable because we push through it. We grit our teeth, we take another deep breath, we do it. We know exactly what to do and we are fully aware of how we should be thinking about ourselves. We have read all the motivational articles, watched all the relevant TED Talks, we know how to increase our productivity. We know how to hack our lives. We are experts in it. We are enlightened, empowered smart guys who can actually credibly write about it, teach it, coach and train others about it.
Yet in unnoticeable little instances, we are standing in our own way, we are hindering ourselves, we are sabotaging our daily lives. It starts small and through repetition we are getting in the maladaptive habit of negative self-talk, self-doubt, raging imposter syndrome. We spend too much time with toxic people and toxic situations, we are prone to give up - and we almost do, until we convince ourselves that it's not really us, who gives up.
Self-sabotage starts small, but it spreads like fire. It is difficult to recognise, and when it gets too overwhelming, it is a lot more difficult to stop it than to nip it in the bud.
How to get out of your own way today and for good?
You know, I am just getting started, and my favourite method is learning as I go. So let’s see how it will go.
Make sure you read the rest of the article by clicking on the Read more button above. And once you are there, clap away (you can give as many as 50 claps on Medium).
I appreciate any feedback, let me know if you have questions or tell me what would you like to read about.
In the meantime, some food for thought…
If you’re up for more self-help, read here about how to become your own biggest fan.
If you are a fellow writer or an aspiring one, learn how to solve these underrated writing issues.
And on the personal side, I quit smoking recently and you can read here my goodbye letter to cigarettes.
It means the world that you are here. Thank you.
Have a nice weekend.
Much love,
Zita